Drive really close behind me. I dare you.

Disclaimer: If I admit to breaking the law in this post, I’m obviously joking.

I never drive really close to the person in front of me.*

Yesterday, this woman in a volvo was following me. I don’t always stick religiously to the speed limit, but i wont usually go more than say 5mph over in a 30/40 zone. But for some reason this BITCH was really close behind and pressured me into doing 38 in a 30, and then 50 in a 40! I’ve never been one to give in to peer pressure, but i think because it was a woman that was behind me, I didn’t want to seem like a pussy driver..!

So on the next bit of road, I’d caught up with a car that was driving about 50mph in a 60mph zone. I personally would have chosen to go a little faster but was in no rush so was happy to follow behindthe guy in front. But Stupid Bitch behind me still felt it absolutely necessary to be right up my arse. So after some thought I decided to be really evil. I SLAMMED on my brakes. MUAHAHA. You should have seen the look on her face as she had to rapidly slow down to avoid hitting me (don’t worry, I’d accelerated again straight away, I wasnt gunna let her hit my car!) she almost had a heart attack. She fucking deserved it. She threw her arms in the air and then suddenly realised she was the one to blame and so backed off. GOOD. I WINZ.

(I wrote this post yesterday but didnt finish it before bed. Turns out all I did today before posting was write the last 5 words and then this little bit in between these parentheses. Tut. Cudda done that yesterday.)

*An exception being a few days ago when some retard in a people carrier went at a constant 21mph in a 30mph zone. ARGHness. I actually consider it dangerous driving. So yes, in that case, after about a minute or two, once I had realised she was driving 21mph for realz, I proceeded to drive fairly close whilest repeatedly flashing my lights and tooting at her. She deserved it. :]